Never Milk That First Cow

When my mother was a newly-wed, her mother gave her a wise piece of advice. Never milk that first cow. My grandmother knew that once the skill of milking cows was acquired, her daughter would get plenty of opportunities to use it. My mother relayed the same advice to me with the added note that I should also avoid learning how to start the lawn mower. I have passed these same instructions along to our married daughter.

According to the 2000 Census, there are 13,177,197 female heads of households in the U.S. who are engaged in far more difficult work than milking cows or mowing lawns. They are attempting to be both father and mother to their children in a danger-ridden and complex world. The negative fallout from this statistic reaches into every facet of American life and eclipses all other problems put together. Far too many jails are being built, far too many children are unsupervised, far too many students drop out, far too many children are being sucked into the culture of drugs and other self-destructive behaviors while their mothers are trying to put food on the table by holding down two or three jobs, and far too many fatherless children are becoming parents to fatherless children.

Those of us who are fortunate to have loving fathers and husbands in our lives take them for granted. Heaven knows . . . and we know . . . they aren’t perfect. Matter of fact, they have a multitude of faults, which we moms, wives and daughters are diligent about trying to correct. After all, turning men into civilized human beings is part of our job description.

Still . . . Father’s Day gives us a chance to say thanks for their immeasurable contributions to the members of their families and to the world. At our house, that means a special dinner, some gifts and a chance for my husband to get out of helping with the dishes.

I’d especially like to thank my father and my husband for never requiring me to milk that first cow.