What Is An Off-Duty Mom?

Occasionally, I listen to Dr. Laura, a popular talk radio personality who dispenses conservative moral advise. Her signature statement is "I am my kid's mom." Within the context of the show, only stay-at-home mothers qualify to make this puzzling statement. I frankly object. If only stay-at-home moms are their kids' moms, what does that make other moms?

The notion that mothers and fathers only wear their titles under ideal circumstances is cause for concern. Parenting is not a uniform that can be donned for special occasions or disposed of altogether if it doesn't fit a person's lifestyle. If some parents are not "true" parents, it follows that they may be released from much of the responsibility of raising their children. In that case, perhaps the government should be awarded the prize of providing more financial support for children in the absence of parents who are otherwise engaged. Maybe absentee fathers should not be expected to pay child support. Possibly, teachers and day-care providers should be delegated more tasks to ensure the moral and spiritual leadership and training of children since parents are off-duty so much of the time. It naturally follows that they must also take more responsibility when things go wrong. This spiraling path of logic is dangerous because it undermines the family as the fundamental building block of a successful society.

Parenting is a gift from God and a state of being, whether the blessing is acquired by giving birth, adoption, marrying into a ready-made family or simply by taking on the responsibilities of a parent Mother Teresa style. There are conditions for receiving this awesome stewardship. They are . . . no return . . . no exchanges . . . no refunds . . . and no time off. A parent is a parent all the time, and there are no such persons as off-duty parents. There are only mothers and fathers who fulfill their duties to the best of their knowledge and abilities and mothers and fathers who do not.

In embracing the philosophy that only parents who are on-duty are deserving of their titles, we do our children and our society a disservice for which all of us must eventually pay.